A: I've heard you applied for that job at the film studio. How was the interview?
B: Difficult, I had to ride a horse for three hours.
A: And did you get the job?
B: No, but the horse did.

A secondary school student asked his teacher if a person should be punished for something he hadn't done. "Of course not," said the teacher. "Good," said the boy. "I haven't done my homework."

I have the feeling that my house isn't too solid. The other day I saw termites wearing helmets.

Security officer: Look, there is poisonous gas in this bottle. Now, what steps would you take, if I dropped this bottle?
Young scientist: Very large ones, sir.

-Waiter, this soup tastes funny!
-So why don't you laugh?

Waiter: "Tea or coffee, gentlemen?"
1st customer: "I'll have tea."
2nd customer: "Me, too - and be sure the glass is clean!"
(Waiter exits, returns)
Waiter: "Two teas. Which one asked for the clean glass?"

A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat.
"Are you crazy?" yelled the customer, "with your hand on my steak?"
"What" answers the waiter, "You want it to fall on the floor again?"

IT Types Of Girls

HARD DISK GIRLS: She remembers everything.
RAM GIRLS: She forgets about you, the moment you turn her off.
WINDOWS GIRLS: Everyone knows that she can't do a thing right, but no one can live without her.
SCREENSAVER GIRLS: She is good for nothing but at least she is fun.
INTERNET GIRLS: Difficult to access.
SERVER GIRLS: Always busy when you need her.
CD-ROM GIRLS: She is always faster and faster.
EMAIL GIRLS: Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.
VIRUS GIRLS: (Also known as "wife") When you are not expecting her, she comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if don't try to uninstall her you will lose everything...

A guy shows up late for work

A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells "You should have been here at 8:30!" he replies: "Why? What happened at 8:30?"